感恩2016

2016

没有人可以比我更了解你经历的
跌倒是每个人都知道的痛
却不是每个人愿意扶你一把
重点也不是这个
而是你愿不愿意站起来
如果你不愿意
坐着又有什么意思

30多年的或许也逃避了许久
是经历把我一步一步推向了解
了解不同角色的心情
真的！必须经历了你才明白

这一年，你进步了！
虽然没达到预期的想法
但是却无可否认，你进步了

人来了，留了，走了
变换无策不是今天才知道的现实

这些痛不要再来
别再妥协你值得更好的

谢谢你们的爱
谢谢你们的信任
那时无比的福气
除了感恩，还是感恩

经营，自己。

在Instagram里我这样写着：

经营。
每个人都说他们很努力经营感情，

经营事业，就是忘了经营自己。

内在、外在、事业和智慧，

请你让自己变得越来越好，

否则时间过去了原地踏步，

你只是岁数比较大的孩子。
我不需要很成功，

只是每天让自己进步一点点！

我的努力其实也不需要别人看见

总相信最后的结果就让人惊讶

时间编排的密密麻麻

依然有时间想念

其实网络上写得好真实

从陌生人到好友再到恋人，牵手到放手，我们在爱情路上兜了一圈，又回到了原点，变成最熟悉的陌生人。

对啊，其实没什么好失望，

没什么好介怀，因为原本就不属于你的，

所以这一切也只是回到了原点。

亲爱的女人，加油吧～

经营自己，包括了让自己享受独处

享受自己一个人的时候没什么好害怕的

享受一个人自由地选择想要做的事

让自己变得更好却不一定要很好

一点一滴的累积

你一定会有进步的

everyday you get better, right?

loves, XOXO

傲慢的自己

曾经我是多么的不喜欢中文
可是我硬着头皮硬闯北京
誓言要突破放弃了中学的中文
嗯，我是就那么得任性

曾经我是多么的不喜欢说话
因为我不希望有人太过于了解我
我不爱说，不爱解释
但是我知道我必须学会表达
可是表达的却不是我最深沉的那一面
于是我选择站在舞台上主持
说的也只是别人需要知道的事
不是我自己的事儿。。。
嗯，还是因为任性，
就是要挑战自己就算不喜欢可我还是能做到

强硬就这样无形中慢慢的融入了我的生活
我不察觉，我无视最真实的感受
慢慢的我只是想着理智的去做我该做的事
我还是忽略了自己最真实的那一面

或许这次我也该好好看看自己
我知道一路走来不容易，所以我特别珍惜
我没有把话说清楚，可是心里很清晰
不敢说我很努力，可是我却忘了跟自己说谢谢

除了愿意当个聆听者，也学习当个能够表达自己的自己
说出来吧，因为语言的能力比你想象中还神奇。。。

承认吧！

承认。。。。。。

承认你做错过的事

承认你放肆任性过

承认你的伤感泪流

承认你不是圣人！

承认你喜欢可爱的饰物

承认你讨厌任何事都解释

承认你喜欢粉色系列

承认你是逼不得已的逼着自己强大

承认你对蕾丝和silk情有独钟

承认你就算在家也要求多多

承认已经不能制作白日梦

承认时间剩下不多要赶快完成该做的事

承认自己的惰性不该对自己仁慈

承认有时候在逃避你心中的害怕

承认你最真实的感受

你承认自己，然后接受自己吗？

我好羡慕她

我好羡慕她

虽然在不完美的家庭成长
却型成了她的独立与自强

虽然他个子比较矮小
可是他的五官精致

虽然她的成绩普通过关
可是她有着很多人羡慕的工作

虽然她比起同年龄的朋友早婚
他先生给了她很多的自由

虽然她现在已经当了妈妈
依然拥有时间去完成梦想和足够的私人空间


当每个人都羡慕她，说着她是多么的幸运
嗯，我也很羡慕她！

有多少人可以像她，工作时间自由还可以在家带孩子
有多少人可以像她，早上别人在车上班时，她在悠闲的看书游泳做运动
有多少人可以像她，婚后老公依然给予充足的个人空间，足够的自由
有多少人可以像她，工作轻松工资也很不错时间可以自行安排
有多少人可以像她，好朋友知己不止一两个，赴汤蹈火在所不辞
有多少人可以像她，生了孩子后依然可以自由，身材比还没生还好

嗯，我真的很羡慕她！

因为工作的关系，场合的需要，
礼服和鞋子都很多，
甚至竟然忘了，买了两双差不多一样的鞋
可是讽刺的是，这些礼服和鞋子，
都没有让她在最珍惜的回忆里出现。。。。

我虽然羡慕她，可是我直到她不快乐
她很努力的进修，她或许真的很动人
吸引了不少的目光
却吸引不了她想要的光！

你不明白，我不明白
连她自己也不明白

A fake PRESENT

There's two courses that I've attended that inspired me a lot

AW and the life course that I've attend when I was in a pageant contest

I knew and I truly understand, being present, appreciate present 

because it's the only thing we can control

it's the only moment we can make a different

and guess what after so many years

I notice I only knowing about "present" 

but I didn't really do what I should…

IRONY !

when I thought I knew but I actually don't 

No matter how much I appreciate that moment

I still have some regrets with it

Experiences show it to me again and again

When Eltroy passed away

When "so near yet so far" has changed

when you thought you will have sometime to make a change

there's still something I can do after it happened…

yes something I regret...

First ever, I step out to see myself

Talk to myself

Acknowledge myself

Speak up to myself

Accept myself

Forgive myself

then I realise previously, it's a fake present…

when you turn back, it's not the scene anymore

let yourself and your soul to feel the pain

take a good look on it, accept it

"it's no sense to sit there when you have fall down"

听说，她失恋了

很多人都说只要持续21天，
坚持21天，
习惯就自然地形成了。。。。。。

她呢？
老早就过了21天了
可是为什么她还没习惯
还没习惯没有他的日子

或许他们不是自然的分开
或许他们在闹别扭
或许他们任何一方不敢提
或许有很多的或许。。。

她说，她很想念他
她说，她不敢打扰他
她说，她不想给他压力
她说，她不懂该怎么做

结果！每天就在玩看对方上线与否的游戏
结果！每天只要她看见他在线上她也就快乐

什么？这样就快乐？
嗯，至少知道他过得好好的
没病没痛没大件事
好好的就好。。。

她努力的工作，什么工作都做
她不让自己休息，担心有多余的时间想念
她没胃口吃东西，因为真的吃不下
她睡不着，可是她努力得把自己弄得很累，就能睡下

她想过很多关于他或许的事物
可是她说她努力阻止自己
我说，女人啊！
还是爱自己好。。。。。。

很努力！

每次想要写作的时候

心里总有很多的想法

心里总是有很多想表达

无奈    真正打开了页面

什么都写不出来了

最近词语不达

胡言乱语

思绪不清晰得无法表达

主持人啊，这真的要不得！

想要表达得很多

却说也说不出口

情况好像没什么改变

伤口只是贴上OK绑暂时止血

多少人羡慕的眼光

我懂，我明白

这一切都不是必然

我感恩

我努力

我很努力

很努力继续加油。。。

我要做回那个快乐得自己

停格

是不是忘了那个自强的自己

是不是变得安静listener就忘了给自己说话的权利

是不是体谅的付出都是都理所当然变得应该

do you take it for granted?

好久没回来，玻璃屋开始变得灰灰的
好久没有在这里清理干净
又或则我在等待时机，一起过大扫除
天空的雨水一直掉落
可是天气却还是那么的阳光普超
你在骗谁？

好脏、好脏。。。
到底有多久没回来
钥匙差点都忘了寄放在哪儿
总是要到挂起暴风雨
才想起玻璃屋的存在

也好，至少这里还是安全的
这里变得好大
我却变得很渺小
我自己选择把自己变得渺小
成全那个世界非常辽阔的大男人

《停格》

動情是容易的 因為不會太久
遠∼遠∼的彷彿可以觸摸
留戀是不幸的 因為曾經擁有
夜∼夜∼被思念纏擾著

無奈我們看懂彼此是彼此的過客啊
愛情是個輪廓不可能私有
把最初的感動鉅細無遺的保留心中

不容許讓時間腐朽了初衷

所以放手 所以隱藏 濕透的袖口
不要挽留 不要回頭 記憶續相守

快樂是容易的 因為短暫逗留
不必換算時間磨合
深愛是殘忍的 它不喜新厭舊
你我 同困在這漩渦

無奈我們看懂彼此是彼此的過客啊
愛情是個輪廓不可能私有
把最初的感動鉅細無遺的保留心中
才不容許讓時間腐朽了初衷

所以放手 所以隱藏 濕透的袖口
不要挽留 不要回頭 記憶續相守

花兒枯了 時間走了 沒有不捨得
心臟停了 空氣死了 愛從此停格

hello, NEW BRAIN !

I'm listening to my favourite singer :WANTING - nobody's fault

Currently at my second home : Lewisgene

You might be curious that why is the new brain as my title of today's blog

No way I just felt that something new happening

A new way of facing L.I.F.E ; A new way of behaviour in my mind

For those that knew me well 

I'm truly a WOMEN's POWER kind of person

I dont depend on people to give me anything, but I make it happen by myself

I trust my own ability and I don't beg or wishing someone to help me out if I'm struggled

That's how I move forward and break thru when I'm STUCK !

I truly blessed with what destiny has chooses for me

My family, My love, My friends, My career, My home... everything

it take sometime to keep moving and go all out just to have a break thru

and i could finally said : I've DID it again !!

I learn all the way where I came from

Especially my long vacation at United States and meeting my bestie in Canada

It give a calm refreshment for me in life !!

Rest and having a peace of mind 

STOP doesnt mean that you're stop moving but a rest for you to see it clearly where you going to

Its been too much, I dont regret but its definitely a lesson and a memory of life

I'm glad I make it...

so here am I.. in a new way, a new behaviour, HELLO MY NEW BRAIN

LIFE is surprise... LIFE is changing moment by moment... 

it might be challenging but you will be blessed when you go with it all along !!

so be blessed what has come to you

acknowledge with what is challenging to you 

you will be surprised....

;)

keep smiling.. move !!

so happy that i'm sitting at here writing it what i've experienced and I'm smiling to what is EXPERIENCED !!

Candies in Life

Sometimes we cant deny or to avoid some bitter part of life

perhaps we can do so much to move to a better life

so what you're going to do ?

I love fashion, I dressed up

yes, his name is CHICKY from KFC

He's invited to join us for my nephew's kid birthday party 

I love cute stuff, I hang out at cutie cafe

I love shopping, so I window shopping

( btw uniqlo always have good deals in kids T-shirt and the best thing is : I CAN FIT )

I love mind relaxing, I go Jacuzzi

 I love to sweat, but if i'm lazy to exercise.. this is where I'm hiding thru..

 

I dont mind to casual hang out alone, in fact I love being alone sometimes !

Do silly things if I want to, if i dont want, bestie could force me... LOL

Be who I want to be, I might struggling with some shits sometimes

but I'm very authentic person !

If I care, I take action. If you hurt me, I don't give a fxck!

Had a very very different experienced shooting and program recording

Know NOTHING, Do something NATURAL

we have 4cars of crew team

u can see the small road on the left side

we got up with the climbing truck LOL!

when we got up.. this is the view..

WHAT ?!

what are we gona do...

no idea..

I only know I have body ache very seriously after climbing the whole mountain !!

Be cool, when things happen is what I have to deal

BE LOVED

Leisure with loves

Leisure weekend for the fantastic Japanese food

definitely worth while to woke up early 

obviously I'm in a good mood to woke up without work too 

XOXO

Love the lighting

It seems like my new office lighting too.. so loved..

Perhaps I should listed it as my favourite place too

^.^

WARNING:

Prepare yourself because we will be having a food tour

Let's go..

Starter

Fresh Salt bake Lobster

BBQ fresh Hokkaido Crab

Chawamushi

the waiter intro me this she called it something similar with Japanese " yong tao fu "

All this at the sushi bar, take as much as you in a buffet style

Our Favourite tea :  Japanese Rice Tea

( if you found any nice Japanese Rice Tea do let me know <3 p="">

Last but not least...

the fruit plater !!

SUPER FULL after all the food and still we've finished  everything

In the end, that's what we had whole day till late night only we have our light food as dinner

YUMMY for this quality and awesome food

you should give a try at Troika KAPACHI

;)

Since a professional make up artist strongly intro me a red lip 

I've decided to try on it..

well no doubt it comes out with a new look and I'm loving it

would love to have it more often..

MUAKS

loves, J

The TGIF

Weekdays could be your busy and headache day

I wil have my work arrangement and meetings on weekdays

Weekends your time for enjoying and relaxing perhaps chill with your friends

It would be my headache time, Hosting and talk for non stop

so eventually if you meet me on weekend I might be a quiet person...

now you know why ? LOL

Axiata Cup had my whole month of concentrating 

since its an outdoor host and exercise too much 

its really a tiring yet an awesome event I've worked thru

creating the history of life, It's my first LIVE SHOW on TV ( even its just about 20minutes )

therefore, I got myself some break time on my friday

so... THANK GOD ITS FRIDAY !!

Done with some preparations of work on SUNDAY

at my favourite chilling place with a cup of Hot Cappuccino 

would be my best choice on TGIF

  

I'm now officially coffee lover ( ahem I'm not so sure since when its happen but I AM.. )

YET, I'm a music lover too ( well its been LONG LONG time ago)

so how come this online DJ will do work without music

and so happen that today's music are.... MY all time favourite.. <3 div="">

what's your best companion when you work ?

maybe you can share some with me

so that I can keep a record and add in to my music library

coz... my online radio is coming back in a month time!!

so.. STAY TUNE...

Meanwhile, when i'm home I'm still doing some cleaning ok!
I'm super take care with my favourite collection
like.. seriously... hahaha..

 

If you're wondering, reason to choose small bottle of fragrance 

Bcoz I'm choosing my smell of the day by my MOOD

so... i need more choices and also not to waste the big bottle..

unless its my favourite.. and yeah you know whats my favourite now !

so signing off... 

share my song of the day for you guys...

enjoy ! happy weekend and.. MUAKS! <3 div="">

xo, J

Girlie Open Up, Birthday in 2013

Number is just a number

how you live without regrets and keep improving yourself 

that's how we keep life interesting and we will be young forever!!

Love my awesome fireworks cake

strawberries always my favourite 

 

It's surprise party after my work

Mr.K book Hulks Cafe for the birthday celebrations with some friends

It's a banglo in bangsar that renovated as a cafe

* try google it if you gona host a party soon *

I love their deco in the cafe

but too bad there's a green light at our table and made all the pictures in greenies seems weird

but of course if you have more guest you could reserve a room 

make sure you have 16ppl to get a room

We would not know what the chef prepare for us

just told him how many guest coming up

he will prepare the dish for you

that's why you might have surprise thru out with it! 

Hopefully I will get some photos soon

since its a surprise party so I never bring my camera 

all the photos with those so call camera man.. well they take like ages to edit photo

so you know why ya =@.@=

- party at 2nd home -

Buddies are too busy in the weekend as most of us work in the weekend

so called "celebrities and designers" willing to celebrate with me

I'm blessed 

even though they set me up !!!!!!!! (grrrhhhhh)

 

They request me to wear GREEN pyjamas for the celebration

so i choose boy friend shirt in green with short pants and bring TUTU along for the party

( asume myself to look like sleep wear, DID I ? 给自己翻白眼 omg.. LOL )

worst thing is.. they date me to my 2nd home

which is a coffee place where I always hang out near by my house

I meet friends there, Yam Cha, Meeting, Script writing.. at here

so i'm kind of familiar with the worker in the cafe

can you imagine when you're so close to this place and you suddenly need to wear pyjamas to be here

and yeah.. not to forget with a cute doll... >.<''

once I'm there I knew ... GOTA CHA !!

everyone wearing K pop or street style in RED !!!

can you imagine how awesome is my buddies ...

 they have practise to play a game that they learn from Running Man

* running man the hottest game program in korea *

perhaps before that we have something to warm up

its all about open up myself party

as in...

GAME ON, NO IMAGE, OPEN UP !!

You do, I do..

accept the challenge!!

They never give up of any chances to made me look ugly..

why i lost ?! because they set me up and they have practise in the game by how to made me lose!!!

 of course I would let this happen like forever...

you gona be in the game too !! HMPH~~~

love my creative cake caption :

   

" HAPPY BIRTHDAY ELEGANT BITCH "

 challenge till the end..

we have our latest hair style to mamak stall for drink 

so say..

CHEESE.........

when you open up, dare to take the challenge

you will have the unexpected result...

thanks darlings...

 Present of the awesome age ?

awesome gifts for sure !!

I'm blessed with all the love from all of you

love that never able to buy from the money

love you guys !!!

-muaks-

J